By Jerrod E. Bohn
Poached Quail Egg served over Warm Greens
pulled from your wallet
Large bills only, please.
Puree of Roasted Cauliflower accompanied by Croquettes d’Privilège
Artisanal potatoes: so succulent & rich.
Local Pan-Seared Trout w/ Toasted Almonds
We own the water rights to what was your favorite fishing hole.
Asian-Spiced Roast w/ Cilantro Chimichurri
& Broiled Asparagus (just so we haven’t appropriated this entire dish)
Rib of some little pest we killed because it was wreaking havoc at the farm, chewing up our $5 leaves of lettuce, so now here it is w/ some KC-Style BBQ sauce because we want to look like we’re in touch w/ our potential blue collar patrons
Best enjoyed w/ a 12 oz. Pabst ($7.00)
Thank you for spending a week’s wages at our restaurant. Since we know you’ll leave empty, we invite you to visit our sister venture, Big Angus, an all-GMO burger and fry joint in the newly gentrified W.E.B. Dubois district.
Jerrod E. Bohn finished his MFA in poetry at Colorado State University. His work has appeared or is soon forthcoming in Phoebe, The Montreal Review, alice blue, FRiGG, Cleaver, SPECS, Word For/Word, Smoking Glue Gun, Watershed Review, and elsewhere. A full-length poetry book, Animal Histories, is forthcoming from Unsolicited Press. He currently lives in Fort Collins, where he teaches yoga and community college writing courses and enjoys cooking and getting outdoors.